Not long after I posted about the sudden departure of the vertigo that I had been suffering from, (Verti-gone) it has decided to return to its home, somewhere inside my head. After a few short weeks of normality, I turned over in bed a couple of nights ago at 3 am, and was woken by the familiar panic, and feeling of disorientation.
At least this time, I knew what it was. I lay there until it passed, then settled back to sleep, wondering if it was a dream, and would it still be there when I woke up. It wasn’t a dream.
I gingerly tested it the next day, and sure enough, I was right. The same feeling of being upside down, the fear of falling forward; it had all the hallmarks of the previous episode. It looks like I am back to having to stay sat up in the bath, being careful about how I turn over, and not moving too quickly. On the plus side, at least I know what it is, and can anticipate the movements that bring it on. As long as I remember to be careful, it should be manageable.
It is remarkable how familiarity with a condition makes you less affected by it. The last time it was around, I didn’t drive, and barely managed to lean forward, or perform simple tasks, without immediately feeling dizzy or that I was going to fall. Vertigo and I have become reluctant partners. I have the measure of it perhaps, but it has re-established occupancy without agreement.
I have put the fear away, and my apprenticeship has been served.
I am learning to live with it.